Issa Rae’s Peabody Award-winning show, “Insecure” turns seven this week. Who would’ve thought, seven years ago, that one show on HBO would have us all in a chokehold for five seasons? At the time it was released, the show was just something fun to watch with your friends or loved ones once a week. You could hop on Twitter every Sunday night and have an unofficial watch party with your followers because everyone was tuned in, tweeting their reactions as the drama unfolded. When the show came to an end, we all filled our Sunday nights with other activities, and eventually pushed Insecure to the back of our minds. At least, that’s what I did.
Re-Discovering Insecure
I was fresh out of college when Insecure first made its way to television screens in 2016. I wasn’t 21 yet, and didn’t understand a thing about being an adult. My only focus was getting a job so that I could pay back my student loans after the six-month grace period ended — and it was quickly approaching.
Watching Insecure back then was a version of escapism . I didn’t relate to any of the storylines. All I knew was Molly always seemed to be doing too much, Issa had to get her life together, Kelli and Tiffany were interesting side characters, and the show cast some very fine Black men. Though far from my reality at the time, when Netflixed announced the hit on their platform this past summer, the tables turned.
At the time, I was going through a breakup and it seemed like everything else in my life was in shambles too. I needed to revisit a time in my life where things seemed easier. I thought watching Insecure would take me back to a simpler time, but I didn’t know I would get slapped in the face with life’s harshest realities.
Lessons on Lessons on Lessons
The show opened up with Issa explaining to a class of young children that she was 28 turning 29 that day. Immediately I knew that this show was setting me up to be in my feels as I was turning 28 this year as well.
As I kept watching the show, I picked up on different themes and lessons that I didn’t catch at 20 years old. I felt Issa. Her desire to want more for herself but not know where that “more” was coming from is what I struggled with (and still struggle with). The idea of constantly making mistakes and not seeing the silver lining in anything was something Issa and I had in common.
Molly and I had similarities as well. My career was, and still is, thriving but for some reason, love can’t seem to find its way to me. At this age, I felt I should be progressing in my love life. In one episode, her therapist pointed out that she uses the word “should” a lot, as if there is a path in life that is guaranteed. Molly wasn’t the only one in that moment whose eyes opened, I got free therapy as well.
It’s Personal
After a while, you would think I would stop watching the show because it all hit home too hard and I was just trying to find an escape. Truthfully, I almost stopped. Then I realized the amount of beautiful lessons the show embedded into its storylines. One of the biggest lessons I received from the show is that everything takes time and although you may want to speed up and get to the part where you’re happy, that isn’t the way life works. The happiness comes from the journey, not the destination.
Issa, Molly, Kelli and Tiffany all thrived by the end of the show. Well into their thirties, they strengthened their friendships, love lives and most importantly their relationships with themselves. They grew as individuals and learned to honor themselves in whatever space they were in. The mistakes they made in their late twenties helped them become the women they ended the series as.
Seven years after it’s series premiere, Insecure gives me hope that my life won’t always be a mess. The mistakes that I currently have to deal with and own in my late 20s don’t define me. They simply set me up to be a better version of myself in the future and I’m grateful for the show to give me that kind of light in a midst of darkness.
Happy anniversary to a transformative show for Black women in their late 20s. May the lessons and laughter continue on for generations to come!